Thursday, June 21, 2007

Rat, 4 cats rescued and resuscitated after Idaho apartment fire

By The Assoicated Press

POCATELLO, Idaho — Firefighters resuscitated four cats and an albino rat from a charred apartment in southeastern Idaho. The animals received oxygen through a special mask designed for small animals that the department got two years ago. Electrical failure likely caused the fire, which resulted in at least $10,000 in damage, fire officials said. No people were injured. Firefighter Kirby Jonas, who whisked the rat to safety, said he was astonished anything survived the flames that engulfed the apartment. He found the rat huddled in blackened bedding in a cage. ‘‘If I were betting money, I would have put down $10,000 that anything in that cage was dead,’’ Jonas said. Also in the room was a poster of an albino rat with a halo over its head, he said. One cat didn’t survive the blaze.

Jason's snark: The source of the fire was traced to a charcoal grill. Apparently the cats were just bbq'ing them a tasty rat.

Monday, June 18, 2007

Man Sets Fire To 4 Cars While Trying To Steal Gas

From WNBC New York

SELDEN, N.Y. -- A 38-year-old Long Island man is under arrest after he accidentally set fire to four cars at an automotive shop while trying to steal gasoline from one of them.
Suffolk County Police said that the Selden man was using a cordless power drill to bore into the bottom of the gas tank of a car parked at Sunrise Automotive in Islip when the fuel ignited.
The man was able to get from under the car unscathed, but the gasoline continued seeping out, spreading flames. Police said three cars were destroyed and a fourth damaged.

Jason's snark: Heard just before the explosion - "Dude, it won't explode. The drill's not even plugged in!"

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Japan to get nursing home for pets

From Mainichi Daily News

Japan will get its first nursing home for dogs with round-the-clock monitoring by doctors and a team of puppies to help aging pooches feel younger, a pet products company said.
Owners pay 98,000 yen (US$800) a month to keep their dogs at the Soladi Care Home for pets, which opens Friday, according to a joint release Wednesday by Soladi Co. and the Endo Veterinary clinic in Tochigi, eastern Japan.
Veterinarians at the home will offer round-the-clock monitoring, and residents will be fed specially fortified food, the release said.
The home, which can accept 20 dogs at one time, will also employ puppies to play with the aging dogs to help them keep fit and feel younger, the release said.
Analysts say that a boom in pet ownership in Japan, coupled with better health care and a more balanced diet, has led to a surge in elderly pets in Japan.
That has spurred doting owners to turn to vitamins, aromatherapy and even acupuncture to help their companions through their old age.

Jason's snark: Can pet 401K plans be far behind?

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Teary-eyed judge mourns pants

From The Associated Press

WASHINGTON — A judge had to leave the courtroom with tears running down his face Tuesday after recalling the lost pair of trousers that led to his $54 million lawsuit against a dry cleaner. Administrative law judge Roy L. Pearson had argued earlier in his opening statement that he is acting in the interest of all city residents against poor business practices. Defense attorneys called his claim ‘‘outlandish.’’ He originally sued Custom Cleaners for about $65 million under the District of Columbia consumer protection act and almost $2 million in common law claims. He is no longer seeking damages related to the pants, instead focusing his claims on two signs in the shop that have since been removed. He alleges that Jin Chung, Soo Chung and Ki Chung, owners of the mom-and-pop business, committed fraud and misled consumers with signs that claimed ‘‘Satisfaction Guaranteed’’ and ‘‘Same Day Service.’’

Jason's Snark: Now we know what the judge wears under his robe.

Monday, June 11, 2007

Woman named Butts charged with theft of toilet paper from Iowa courthouse

From The Associated Press

MARSHALLTOWN, Iowa — Police blame a woman named Butts for stealing toilet paper from a central Iowa courthouse, and while they’re chuckling, the theft charge could put her in prison. ‘‘She’s facing potentially three years of incarceration for three rolls of toilet paper,’’ Chief Lon Walker said, stifling a laugh as he talked to KCCI-TV about Suzanne Marie Butts. ‘‘See, I can’t say it with a straight face.’’ Workers had noticed the rolls disappearing from the Marshall County Courthouse much faster than usual, Walker said. Butts, 38, was caught last week after an employee saw her taking three rolls of two-ply tissue from a storage closet, Walker said. Butts insisted it was the first time she’d pilfered toilet paper, but she declined to answer further questions on her attorney’s advice. The fifth-degree theft charge, a misdemeanor, normally carries a sentence of less than a year in jail. But Butts could face more time if convicted under the state’s habitual offender law because she has prior theft convictions. Walker did not know why Butts was at the courthouse, but said that she did not work there.

Jason's snark: Sometimes you can't make these stories better if you try.

Friday, June 8, 2007

McDonald’s fries, Cheez Whiz scientist dies

From MSNBC

MADISON, Wis. - Edwin Traisman, a food scientist who created the process for freezing McDonald's french fries and helped develop Cheez Whiz, has died at age 91.
Traisman died Tuesday at the University of Wisconsin Hospital and Clinics following a heart attack, said his granddaughter Jenna Greene, of Chevy Chase, Md.
Born in Chicago on Nov. 25, 1915, to Latvian immigrants, Traisman was the only of six siblings to graduate from high school. He earned a bachelor's degree in chemistry from the University of Illinois in 1937.

Jason's snark: Folks, he was 91. I told you cheese fries were health food.

Thursday, June 7, 2007

Michigan man in wheelchair takes wild ride lodged to truck’s front

From The Associated Press

PAW PAW, Mich. — A man was taken on a wild ride when his wheelchair became lodged in the grille of a semitrailer and was accidentally pushed down a highway for four miles at about 50 mph, authorities said. The 21-year-old man, whose name was not released, was unharmed but was taken to a hospital as a precaution. He had been secured to his wheelchair by a seat belt. ‘‘The man spilled his soda pop, but he wasn’t upset,’’ said Sgt. Kathy Morton of the Michigan State Police. About 4 p.m. Wednesday, a caller told police dispatchers, ‘‘You are not going to believe this: There is a semi truck pushing a guy in a wheelchair on Red Arrow Highway,’’ state police said in a release. Authorities initially wondered whether the report was a prank call until others called with similar reports. Officers stopped the truck — wheelchair still attached — at a trucking company. The driver didn’t believe officers until he stepped from his cab and saw for himself. ‘‘When he saw us, he was like, ’What’s going on?’’’ Morton said. An investigation revealed the man in the wheelchair had pulled in front of the truck at a gas station and it somehow became lodged by its handles to the front grille.

Jason's snark: Wish I could have been the dispatch officer taking that call.

Michigan man in wheelchair takes wild ride lodged to truck’s front

From The Associated Press

PAW PAW, Mich. (AP) — A man was taken on a wild ride when his wheelchair became lodged in the grille of a semitrailer and was accidentally pushed down a highway for four miles at about 50 mph, authorities said. The 21-year-old man, whose name was not released, was unharmed but was taken to a hospital as a precaution. He had been secured to his wheelchair by a seat belt. ‘‘The man spilled his soda pop, but he wasn’t upset,’’ said Sgt. Kathy Morton of the Michigan State Police. About 4 p.m. Wednesday, a caller told police dispatchers, ‘‘You are not going to believe this: There is a semi truck pushing a guy in a wheelchair on Red Arrow Highway,’’ state police said in a release. Authorities initially wondered whether the report was a prank call until others called with similar reports. Officers stopped the truck — wheelchair still attached — at a trucking company. The driver didn’t believe officers until he stepped from his cab and saw for himself. ‘‘When he saw us, he was like, ’What’s going on?’’’ Morton said. An investigation revealed the man in the wheelchair had pulled in front of the truck at a gas station and it somehow became lodged by its handles to the front grille.

Jason's snark: Wish I could have been the dispatch officer taking that call.

81-year old Los Angeles woman found living with about 120 pet rats

From The Associated Press

LOS ANGELES — Officers seized more than 100 pet rats, dozens of rabbits and other animals including several birds from the home of an 81-year-old woman, who was later treated at a hospital for what appeared to be bites, authorities said. ‘‘The woman had no food in the house for herself and seemed disoriented,’’ said Annette Ramirez, an officer with the city’s Animal Services Department. ‘‘Her arms were covered with open wounds apparently caused by animal bites.’’ Animal control officers discovered the scene while investigating a report Monday of unkempt conditions at a home in suburban Wilmington. In all, they found about 120 rats, 25 rabbits, six parakeets, a dog, a quail and a cockatiel, she said. The woman, identified as Wanda Langstom, was overwhelmed by how quickly the rats reproduced, Ramirez said. ‘‘She said it just started with two but it got out of hand,’’ Ramirez said. Most of the animals were in fair condition, but two rabbits needed medical attention. They will all be available for adoption after being treated by a veterinarian, she said.

Jason's snark: Great news: 120 rats will soon be available for adoption. Being L.A., they'll probably find good homes.